I am a Father (Part 1)

[The post has been backdated to 2014]

2013 was an eventful year in our lives. We were blessed with our little baby girl, lurching us although expectedly, into a wonderful life. There are some moments you just cannot forget (or can forget due to old age). Below are some of them

It must have been April, when i got to know, i will be an dad. First reaction was of measured and controlled happiness, as happy emotions tend to make you reckless, and makes your heart in such an high place, that any small sad news can bring it crashing down 10 stories high. So with a cautious measure of happiness, i asked to confirm twice. And yes it was true. Now this news had to taken as an adult, cause now there is going to be a human being who is going to be dependent on you, reply on you, trust completely on you and be shaped by your actions.Ohh yes and movies are really stupid, as they never show a real situation, like mother and father talking over phone, and mother giving the news that she is pregnant from 1631km away.

Then wife shifted to her hometown and i used to travel 595km every weekend without fail, just to be with her. watching her grow slowly, listening the heartbeats, wanting to sleep on the tummy (i have a huge one and everyone wants to sleep on it, that was my only chance to experience the feeling). The first sonography test showing small hands, heartbeats, and many other things which, keep the memory alive.

Then the delivery date was 3 weeks away and i was planning for the leaves, already had told boss will be gone for 2 weeks. But life is not like a movie, there is no script, just god playing DnD dice. Usually i call up wife during the weekdays, and in the morning i call, and she says contractions are getting shorter, but maybe be a false alarm, but still going to the doctor. Now my mind can be split in 2 parts, one which is really worrried about her, and still my other part takes over and talks me to complete my project. Hence i get engrossed and start completing my project. When i look at the clock it's almost past the time i call her in the afternoon and i pick up the phone, tap the no's. The first answer i get from her dad is, 'You are a Dad'. I said 'Majak na karo, mummy ne aapo'. (Don't joke, give it to mummy). And she gives me the same sweet news. First thought is whether Nidhi is fine, and everyone is fine, so i relax, hangup. And stay stunned for a few min. My neighbor is watching me funnily, asking me what happened, and i am speechless for a few min. The din of the office recedes, and my mind is filled with pure joy. That is something i never let myself experience in fear of becoming very sad. But this news were something that were never going away and can never be surpassed. That moment was bliss. Even in the florescent lighted office, everything was bright, everyone was happy, the world had come to a standstill, because everyone had achieved nirvana. As i was far away, i booked a plane ticket, reached wife's place next morning, took hold of my baby, my small bundle, with wrinkled hands and feet, face as beautiful as mine, eyes as big as her mom's, the perfect solution. I asked about her health and she was little underweight, but healthy. I put her near her mom and just waited and watched.

You Need to Lose Something

On 2nd Jan, i had just came from Baroda, enjoying my daily morning schedule of reading on my mobile (Samsung Galaxy S2) and travelling. I have always hated travelling, its a big bore and makes me restless. Unless i have something to read i cannot stand it. When i don't have a book, i usually sleep. But sleeping in Mumbai local trains is like asking to be robbed or missing your station. Hence the emphasis on reading.

I have almost always arrived at Mumbai in the morning, getting less rush, hence i can get home by 6 and sleep a little. On 2nd i came back, slept, played a little on my phone, some games and was searching for all the rooted apps i can install. I was very proud that i had just rooted my phone. I waited for more than an year to root it. My inner geek would have done it the day i got it, but was not sure if the warranty will get void.

I started for my journey to office, talked to my wife and was waiting in the bus line, listening to music. The bus came it pushed for space to board the bus. Once inside something was not right, there was no music. I realized instantly that my phone was missing. It was a horrible feeling. The feeling that i had lost something was alien to me. I panicked, rushed back to the entrance, trying to get off, but the bus was in full motion. The conductor wouldn't listen to me, i was almost going to jump off the running bus. 

But then it dawned, i had lost something which was very near to me. I had lost something which i had got so used to, that it was a part of my life. The phone was like an extension of my mind. Anything i wanted i could do it because of that tech in my hand. I could search for anything, book/buy stuff, record my ideas, communicate with my friends, keep up with news, read, play, draw, etc. It was an outlet of my imagination. Since i bought it, i don't remember a single day without it. Even my family knows how much i love it. There was an another emotion attached to it too. The phone had cost me 30 thousand bucks. It was more than my 2 months salary. It was a craving you have when you want something REAL bad. I had bought it with support from my wife. She didn't say no. She knew how much i wanted it and even chipped in. But it unsettled my accounts for 2 months. I had paid a very big price for buying the phone. Something i had decided i would never do again. But i was proud of what i had brought. This is a feeling that i hadn't got before

Being proud of something, is what you reallly want when you grow up. It can consume you. You are proud that you are a father, you are proud that your project was successful. Similarly you are proud that you are able to afford something which is very difficult to afford. This feeling of pride was what i had for all these months. But i never understood it. It always was in the back of my mind, but only understood it after i lost the phone.

This loss, was instant, and it hit me very hard. I couldn't think what i should do next. I sat there in the bus frustrated, feeling angry that i it was my carelessness due to which i had lost the phone. I should have been more careful. Maybe i should have put it in my bag. But loss is instant. You can never be prepared for it. And This got me thinking more.

What if i lose something very dear in the next instant. What if all my loved ones, whom without i cannot live, die the next instant. What will i do?  If you can lose someone so instantly what's the meaning of taking any relation so deep that it hurts? Will i be able to cope with the loss?

So i sat in silence. For a long time. Sad from all my thoughts.

By evening the news had spread to all. And a wonderful thing happened. My Wife cried for me. My Brother told me he is buying me a new phone. My mom dad told me they would be paying my savings for a few months. But whatever the reason, everyone was caring for me. Even though i had lost only my phone. 

Maybe losing the phone was worth enough to see how much everyone cares for you. Like i said before, sometimes you get used to something soo much that it feels a part of your life. And you tend to ignore it a bit. Relations are that thing. You get used to each and every relation, may it be to a person or an object, so much that it just becomes a word. It's only in these bad times when you really understand which has depth. 

I should not have been proud of my achievement of buying the phone. I should be proud that i have such a Beautiful family. This is my family who cares for me soo much, they are going to help me out whatever it takes. I don't need the money, i now don't even need the phone. The phone can be replaced. BUT my family cannot. 

So thanks to the incredible loss i suffered, for bringing me close to the people who are the real value of my life.

Thanks for Everything Investis

Hi All,

I will be ending my work shift today for the final time in Investis today. And I feel sad that I am leaving behind the work I helped create. In these 4 years I worked on many different tasks, although most of them were only or IQR. I saw the IQR product grow from its inception to the state it is now. That is how much I loved my work here, and I feel very sad to leave it.

But when I really thought about what I will MISS, is not working on the projects, but some small little things I have grown used to, these few years. It may be the smile the Guard Kaka gives me when I come, or how Abhish says ‘Chai’ on the 4^th floor or the 'Shabji' of Nielsen & stories from Sandeep. Or maybe how we greet each other daily, chatting on Skype, tea break gossips, Lunch buddies, Chai buddies, Buddies I made during TT all these years. I have also loved talking and chatting with many others, over books, over Tea, having Hot discussions and sharing Philosophies.

Other things memorable are my Calls with Al & Rupert, Justin’s address during the biyearly SOTN (Let me say its sad that we are in a dry state), and working with Marcus & Dom

It was great fun with all you guys/gals. 4 Years is a long time and I have meet some extraordinary, talented and humane friends here. And I am really sad that I will not be able to meet you daily now. Its sad to leave  3 of my older colleagues Manish, Chirag, Anisha after almost 7 years working together, along with Mamta, Archana, Prakash & Hardik.

The list of thanks wouldn’t be complete without mentioning AP sir, Asmani, Monali & Vaishali, along with, the Finance team of Jayesh, Prashant, Himanshu, Hiren, Bhavesh & Kaushik. Also Thanks to all those who helped me learn TT (There are many)

But to compensate, my doors at Mumbai are always open to you. If you are visiting , call me up and we can have a meetup.

Being a social Media person, it should be mandatory to put all my details here in the mail. If you love getting spammed by nice articles to read, subscribe to any of the following accounts.

Twitter: Shrikhande, BeginnersWeb, BAShrikhande

Blogs: Personal, Beginnersweb, AndroidApps

Facebook: Me

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Foursquare: Me (I am sure no can beat me at being mayor of our office)

GoodReads: Me

Trip Advisor: Me

Google Reader: Articles

Thanks for everything Investis.

Who says technology isn't great?

This post is written from my android phone, while remotely logged in to my windows

Mind it all apps are paid, even windows ;-)

The Dark Knight Rises : Review (Spoiler Free)

One Word : A Perfect Ending.

More Words: Pretty much everything a legend should get as an end.

Thanks : Chris Nolan for bringing such a pure and realistic Batman to the screens. And to keep the fans and comic book nerds happy with the ending. 

Review: Batman Rises is many comic book series rolled into one. And they are one of the best of the Batman series. Knightfall, Batman Returns, Rise of Ras Al Gul. But not taken in their entirety. Some might say batman rises is not as good as the dark knight, but i say its what a superhero movie should be.

Post Avengers, everyone would like to see high action movies, but Nolan gives us a movie about normal people without super powers becoming superheroes. Batman, Selina Kyle, Bane even Gordon and Blake, all are superheroes without powers. They only power they have is the will to overcome. And that is the message Nolan delivers. Take control of your fear with your will. Be fearless. Master fear. This is the message the batman comics gives us and so does Nolan.

Character:

Batman: Well acted by Bale. Strong, weak , afraid, angry, its what makes Bale a great Batman. Its possible that i cannot see any other actor as a batman for some time.

Gordon: Oldman is strong as usual, strong, silent and working in the background to give a human feel to the police force. Loved him.

Bane: Seeing what Hardy had done in Bronson this might have been a cinch. But still well acted and he does look huge, almost towering Batman and others. It shows the work Hardy has done for the act. Loved him and his bane. Only issue is the voice. But it seems all batman movies were plagued by voice problems.

Blake: An orphan policeman who helps Gordan take care of the mess Gotham is in. Love the cleaverness and resourcefull ness shown by him. 

Selina Kyle: And if you want to someone as sexy as the catwoman, there is nobody other than Hathaway for you. The way she looks sucks you into him. The way she walks makes the comic book pages jump up on the screen, but its the acting she has done which makes selina kyle live on the screen. 

Alfred: He has the most pivotal role whether it is a movie or the books. He is the only force who keeps batman a real person, and not get lost. He is the anchor which keeps Batman Bruce Wayne. Caine acts out aflred with a passion and there is no way you cannot love him here.

Final Thougts:
It's not a action movie, its a movie about overcoming your fears. Its a movie which is more near to the comic books than the previous non Nolan movies. Its a movie rooted in a real world, rather than a comic book. Its a movie which wraps up the trilogy with an end fit for its watchers, fit for the comic nerds, fit for Batman fans.

Thanks to reading.

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